Our Love Story
by Rosa3098
Summary: Katniss and Peeta meet before they were reaped. They became friends and grew to have feelings for each other. But Katniss makes the mistake of being too scared of her feelings and pushes Peeta away. What will happen when the Hunger Games bring them together? Will they be the 'star-crossed lovers' for real?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

* * *

_Love is for the weak. Love is fleeting and once it's gone it brings nothing but pain and sadness to its unfortunate victim. I will never understand it. Love is useless. Love hurts. Love is for the weak and stupid. I don't need it. I'll never understand why some people dream and hope of finding someone to love. They're just setting themselves up for hurt. Love is for the weak. _

I repeat this over and over in my head as I walk past him. I can feel his gaze on my back; a queasy feeling suddenly appears in my stomach. Goosebumps run down my spine making me feel even more uneasy than I already am. I can't stand the awkwardness and the nervousness that comes very time I see him in this god forsaken District. I sigh quietly as the feelings and memories of that day all come running back to me. I had managed to push them to the back of my mind for the past week but not, that I see him, they force their way to the front of my mind.

"_What did I do?" He had asked. There was a pain filled expression on his usually lovely and calm face. Dark clouds had started rolling in making the scene gloomier than it had to be. A flash of lighting illuminated his pain filled face followed by a clash of thunder. "Please, tell me why."_

"_I – I'm sorry." I whispered. I turned around, grabbed my bow and arrow, and began running back. _

"_Katniss!" Peeta called. I heard him run after me. He reached for my wrist and pulled me back to him. "Katniss, please." He whispered. His face was close. Too close. I could feel his warm breath on my cheek. _

"_Let go." I said, it was meant to sound firm and strong but all that had come out was a whisper that was as soft as the wind. "Please, let go." His grip loosened. _

"_Please, don't go." He says. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that." I bite my lip. I can't stand seeing him like this. _

"_I'm sorry." I whisper. "We can't be friends anymore." The words feel wrong. _

"_Why?" he whispers. Why? Because I'm scared. Because I don't deserve to be with you. Because love brings nothing but pain. Just look at with it did to my mother._

"_Because I don't want to see you." I had said. He lets go of my wrist. "We will never be – just, leave me alone, Peeta." And I ran. _

Now that I think about it I should probably have left him closer to the fence. He might have gotten lost in the woods. But then again he seems to have made it back okay. I begin to walk faster in order to get away from his pain filled stares.

I'm thankful that I don't have any classes with him. Well, except for Music class. It seems that they choose to stick us both in the same Music class every year. I've tried to get out of this class twelve times in the past week alone but. . . The past week. So it's been a week since I hurt him. A week since I told him to leave me alone.

"Katniss." Someone says. I look up from my shoes. Madge.

"Hi." I say. She motions for me to follow her to the back of the class. I guess this is where we're going to be sitting for today. Madge and I always seem to get stuck together. You would think that since she was the mayor's daughter she would have more people to sit with than a girl from the seam.

I'm sitting quietly, focused on the lesson, for about ten minutes then the thoughts of Peeta resurface. History class gives me nothing to think about, no problems to solve like in math, no books to read like in reading class, just countless of stories from the past. And it is the past I'm thinking of. But not of Panem; of Peeta.

In the middle of class, the teacher closes her book. She tells us we can work on our homework or just talk for the rest of the class. I don't like this. The lesson had given me something else to try and focus about but it seems now that the lesson is over and my homework is done, my thoughts want nothing more than to be filled with those of Peeta.

"Katniss." Madge says. I turn my head toward the left expecting for her to ask me about a homework problem that I probably don't know how to solve any more than she does.

"Yeah?" I say.

"Why do you look upset?" Her voice is soft, calm.

"I. . ." I consider lying to her. Wouldn't it be better to say that nothing is wrong? That I'm just tired. That nothing is wrong. That what happened with Peeta over the break is nothing. But how can I tell her that when she trusted me completely? She told me about the boy who cheated on her five months before. She let me see her cry even though we weren't necessarily best friends at the time. But now we are. And you talk to a best friend about problems such as these right?

I lower my voice to just above a whisper. "It's Peeta." Her eyes widen. She looks around the room then back at me. We'll talk about it later, in private, if you want, her look says. I nod and smile lightly. She momentarily places her hand on my shoulder then begins working again.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

I tap my foot repeatedly as the music teacher goes on and on about vocals and such. My eyes keep drifting to the empty seat three chairs down then to the door. He's not here. A Part of me is thankful for his absence but the other part is worried. Is he sick? In trouble? Or did he just skip this class because of me? I scowl. Why should I be worried? It's stupid. I should just forget about everything. What happened means nothing. I just had to tell him the truth. It wasn't fair to Peeta. He had to know I could never love him. A sigh escapes my lips.

"Katniss," the teacher says. He trusts a book toward me. I look up at him, a bored look on my face.

"Yes?" I ask.

"You seem bored." He says. "So sing this. You can sign right?" I look down at the book he holds out. The Valley Song. Why is it that this is the only song that we ever sing? Sure, there are lullabies, the anthem of Panem, but this is the song that we sing the most often. Maybe it's because it doesn't imply anything rebellious.

"No," I say. "I can't." Ever since that first day of school all of my music teachers have been desperate for me to sing in class. I don't understand why. What have they to gain from it? He pursed his lips and turns away. He asks me to sing at least once a week each ending the same way.

I feel relieved when the final bell rings and I can leave. I gather my stuff quickly and head to Prim's classroom. Normally I would meet her outside but during lunch Madge had asked me if I would like to go over to her house to talk. I had agreed to go and now I need to tell Prim. I turn the corner to Prims classroom. She's talking to someone. And he's not a sixth grader. Prim looks upset as Peeta tells her something. She frowns and wraps her arms comfortingly around him. He pulls away a second later and turns to leave, giving Prim one last wave.

"Why was she talking to Peeta?" Madge suddenly asks. I hadn't realized she was standing behind me. I shrug.

"They were friends." I say.

"Katniss!" Prim calls. A smile appears on her lips as she runs towards me. She appears to have no idea that I was watching her and Peeta interact. Good.

"Hey little duck," I greet. "Can you manage walking home by yourself? I'm going over to Madge's but if you don't want to walk alone then –" Prim shakes her head.

"Actually, I kind of wanted to go over to a friend's house too," She says with a sweet smile.

"That's great." Madge says. "Now you won't have to walk home alone." Prim nods.

"Well, I'll see you at home Katniss! Bye!" she gives me a hug then turns to leave. I expect her to walk out the main door at the end of the hall but instead she goes out the backdoor. The one that leads to the main square. The door Peeta used.

"You don't think. . ." Madge trails off. She, too, is watching the door Prim left from. I shake my head.

"No," I say. "She wouldn't. She's afraid of his older brother." Madge nods.

"Rye is scary – but he's cute." She smiles. I resist the urge to roll my eyes. "Come on, let's go." It's always like this when we're alone. Madge lightens up and acts like the other girls and even I crack a smile and joke around. But we never gossip. Gossip is something we can't stand. We've both been the main subject around the school – other that the reaping that's in two days that is. Madge and her boyfriend of two months had recently broken up causing quite a stir. Then there's me and Peeta. We have been seen together a lot the past month and people have begun talking about it. But now people are talking even more, wondering why Peeta and I aren't talking.

"So what happened?" she asks as we reach her house. I look down at my shoes again, scowling. Yes, what exactly did happen?

"I took Peeta to the woods." I start. Madge raises her eyebrow. She knows about my hunting – practically all of District 12 knows – but she also knows that I rarely take people out there. "He asked." I shrug. Madge motions for me to continue as we walk up the stairs. I've been over the Mayors house a few times before to work on different school assignments with Madge so I'm used to it. "I showed him around a few times then right before school started Peeta –"

"Tried to kiss you?" she asks. My eyes widen. I shake my head quickly.

"N-no! No. Why would he do that?" I ask. Madge turns her head to the side, confused. A second later a smile appears on her face. We both know why. Peeta loves me. But I can't love him. Love leads to marriage, marriage leads to children, and children are something I can never bring into this world. Not with the reaping. Madge knows this.

"Oh, Katniss." She sighs. "Continue."

"We started talking and he started talking about us." I say. I look around Madge's room in order to avoid her gaze. "He told me that everyone at school thought we were together."

"Why is that bad?" she asks. I sigh.

"It made me feel . . . a little weird." I say. "Especially because Peeta seemed a little happy at the idea. . . what?" Madge lifted her hand up to stifle a laugh.

"Oh Katniss!" she laughs.

"It's not funny." I scowl. "Do you want to hear the rest or not?" She quiets down and asks for me to continue. "He told me he loved me again and this time I just . . . couldn't. I felt awful because he must have thought I loved him to. And that's when I told him we shouldn't be friends anymore. I told him we had to stop what we were doing – people were starting to talk after all. But he was so upset, he asked me why – I think he thought it was his fault – but Madge I can't be with him."

"Why?" she asks. I sigh. I grab one of the pillows that lie on her bed and crush it to my chest.

"I don't want to fall in love. I don't want to get married – and I certainly don't want to fall in love and marry Peeta!" Madge smile disappears. I sigh again knowing how mean I just sounded. "No, I don't mean it like that – it's just that –"

"Gale?" Madge asks. I look up at her.

"No." I say. My voice holds no emotion. "Gale is just a hunting partner – a friend."

"Is that really all?" she asks. I've known Gale for a few years now. He's one of the few people who I'm actually comfortable being myself around. He's my hunting partner. We help each other. But there's nothing romantic between us.

"Yes." I say firmly.

* * *

Yes. It's another story. I plan on finishing this one rather quickly. I already have most of it written now i just have to publish. Tell me what you guys think please! :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

* * *

I wake up feeling the other side of my bed is cold. Prim must have had nightmares and moved to sleep next to mother. Of course she did, today is the day of the reaping after all. I get up in an almost robotic way and move to get dressed. I put my hair in its usual braid down my back and grab my supple leather hunting boots. I'm out the door and into the cool morning air in less than ten minutes. I make my way under the fence that surrounds District 12. Hidden inside a log are several different bows and arrows one of which is mine.

"Morning Catnip." Gale greets. I've never really gotten used to the way Gale moves throughout the woods with so little noise. Almost like a ghost.

"Morning." I say. We make our way around the woods gathering berries, checking snares, shooting a few squirrels – just the daily routine. We don't exchange many words here in the woods – it would scare away game.

"Good luck today." Gale smiles as we go our separate way. He stops just before he reaches the fence. "And may the odds." He throws one of the berries we had gathered earlier my way. I smile and catch the berry in my mouth, it sweet juice exploding in my mouth.

"Be ever in your favor." I finish with a smile. Gale waves goodbye as I make my way back to the log where I hide the bows and arrows. I begin to feel nervous now that I'm reminded of the reaping. My name has been entered in the reaping bowl too many times. The fear of being reaped is overwhelming. If my name gets pulled out of the reaping bowl then who is going to take care of my sweet sister Prim? Who will make sure she doesn't go hungry? Who will make sure she's safe? I can't count on my mother, not after she left us to fend for ourselves after father passed away.

I arrive home to find that a bath is ready for me. My mother has set out a blue dress for me to wear to the reaping. After my bath, I look at the soft blue dress hesitantly. I know that my mother's clothes from her past are precious to her.

"Put it on, Katniss." Mother says with a smile.

"Are you sure?" I ask. She nods. After I'm dressed my mother sets me down and begins to braid my hair on top of my head. Prim comes out of the bedroom wearing my first reaping outfit. She smiles when she sees me.

"You look beautiful." Prim says. I refuse the urge to scoff and roll my eyes. Knowing Prim she really means it. Somehow beautiful would be one of the last words I would describe myself as, ordinary is more fitting.

"Tuck your tail in little duck." I say as I see that the back of her shirt has become un-tuck. Prim gives a small quack in response. I smile warmly at my little sister.

* * *

Everyone is required to be at the reaping by two in the afternoon. Later Peacekeepers will come to every house to make sure no one tries to skip the reaping. If you are caught at home you will be severely punished – unless, of course, you are at death's door.

I hold on to Prim's hand as we make our way to the check-in area where someone will sign us in. After that Prim makes her way to the twelve year olds section after giving me a hug. I whisper that it's going to be okay. She's not going to get picked. She's one slip in thousands. I step in line at the sixteen year olds section.

At exactly two o'clock Effie Trinket appears on the stage wearing a bright pink wig along with a bright yellow suit. She smiles brightly. "Welcome, welcome!" she says. Her voice is high pitched and annoying. The Capitol accent itself is annoying, no wonder it's impossible not to make fun of them. "And may the odds be ever in your favor." She walks towards the two glass reaping balls. I'm nervous. Nervous for Gale who has over forty slips in the boys reaping ball, nervous for Madge even though she's relatively safe, nervous for Prim – even though the chances of her getting picked are so slim. She's only been entered once after all. And I'm nervous for Peeta. "Ladies first!" she says. I bite my lip as she dips her hand into the girls reaping ball. The square is quiet, so quiet you could hear a feather fall on the floor. Her hand rummages through the papers and pulls out a white paper. I hold my breath. She opens it. A smile still on her bright yellow lips.

"Primrose Everdeen!" she calls. There was once an incident where I had fallen from a tree. The fall had knocked the air right out of my lungs and I lay, unmoving, trying to breath. That feeling, of breathlessness appeared again as I see Prim make her way to the stage. My feet start to move forward. I'm ready to push my way through the crowd but no one steps in my way. They all make a line for me to pass.

"Prim!" I gasp. One slip in thousands! One slip! "Prim!" Prim stops, one foot on the stairs the lead to the stage. Her eyes are wide, tears threaten to fall. Peacekeepers grab my arm and pull me back. "I volunteer!" I gasp. "I volunteer as tribute!" There's silence. Then suddenly Prim is screaming.

"No!" she yells. The peacekeepers release me. "Katniss!"

"Well, well, well." Effie says. "The first District 12 volunteer! Come on up dear." I take a step towards the stage but suddenly Prim is at my side. She clings to me.

"Prim let go." I say. She's crying and I'm about to cry. But I can't. I can't cry. Later when they replay the reaping everyone will see. And I can't be marked off as a weakling. I can't. "Prim, let me go."

"No!" she cries. "No Katniss! No!" Then Gale is there and he's carrying Prim away. You can still hear her screams though. I make my way up the stairs and stand next to Effie.

"My, my, my, what an interesting reaping!" Effie thrills. "And what is your name dear?"

"Katniss Everdeen." I'm glad that my voice doesn't falter. It's strong. Brave.

"I bet my buttons that was your sister." She says. "Don't want her to steal all the fame, right dear?" I purse my lips. "Now for the boys!" she makes her way to the boys reaping bowl. I only have time to wish for Gale safety when she pulls out a white slip. She walks back to the microphone. "Peeta Mellark!" And again, I feel that my breath is knocked out of me. I don't understand. Why Peeta? Why him out of every boy in the District? Why? It seems like the odds are completely against me.

My eyes lock on Peeta as he makes his way to the stage. He's looking down at the ground.

"Any Volunteers?" Effie asks. Peeta has two older brothers but one is too old for the reaping and the other won't come up. But right now I'm hoping someone – anyone - volunteers. "Very well! Give it up for District twelve's seventy-fourth hunger games tributes!" But no one claps.

Just about everyone In the District knows about Peeta and me. They know how my father died when I was little, they know how I hunt and defy the law in order to keep my family from starving. They know how Peeta and I had started talking just three months ago. They know that Peeta and I had been on the verge of being a couple. They know Peeta has loved me since we were five. They know I broke his heart. They know this is wrong. So no one claps. Instead someone lifts three fingers to their lips and then holds it out in our direction. I see apologetic looks in all of their eyes even though this isn't their fault. Huh, who knew Peeta and I had become such celebrities in the past few weeks.

* * *

After the reaping we are taken to the Justice building where we will say goodbye to all of our loved ones. Peeta and I never talk or even so much as glance at each other as the peacekeepers escort us to the Justice building. I'm thrown into a room with a lone sofa. A few seconds later Prim and my mother enter. Prim has tears running down her cheeks as well as my mother.

"It's all right." I whisper comfortingly. "Don't cry." I begin to tell them of all the way they can get by without me. Prim can sell her goat milk and cheese, my mother has her heeling business, those two things can keep them fed if they are careful. Gale will bring them game and he will probably not ask for anything in return but they should give him something – like medicine or cheese. "Are you listening?" I ask mother. "You have to take care of her!" I say. "You have to! I won't be there anymore! You can't leave!"

"I-I know –"

"You have to take care of her!" I say. She nods.

"I'm sorry I was sick – if I had the medicine I had now then I –"

"Then take it!" I say. "Just don't leave her. Please." Mother nods again. I pull them both toward me into a tight hug. "I love you – I love you both." I say. Then the peacekeepers are here.

"You have to win!" Prim yells as they order her out. "Promise me you'll win!" I hesitate. I can't win, she must know that. "Katniss promise me please!"

"I promise Prim!" And now I have to.

"I'm sorry about Peeta!" she cries just as the door closes. Just the thought of Peeta brings tears to my eyes. If I win, he dies. Peeta. I can't cry. I wipe my eyes with my hand. The door opens again. This time it's Gale. He runs toward me and pulls me into a hug. We're silent for a moment. He tells me to get my hands on a bow, to make one if necessary, to hide up in the trees and shoot squirrels. He tells me that I have to win. I listen and keep quiet.

"Katniss are you listening?" he asks. I nod. "You have to win."

"There are twenty three other people that will be trying to kill me Gale." I say. "I can't –"

"Yes you can, you know how to hunt."

"I hunt animals Gale." I say.

"How different can it be?" he asks. I don't answer. Because he's right. If I can forget their humans then it will be no different at all. Then the Peacekeepers are back.

"Don't let them starve." I yell.

"I won't! I promise! Katniss I-" The door is shut. I'm left alone for about three minutes before the doors opens again. By now I'm exhausted.

"Madge." I say. She hugs me tightly for a minute.

"Will you wear this?" she asks. She holds out a pin – her mocking jay pin. The one that belonged to her aunt.

"I can't." I say knowing just how much it means to her.

"Yes you can." She says. "Here," She pins it to my dress. "This will be your token – to remind you of home." She smiles sadly. "I'm sorry. It's bad enough that Prim got reaped but him too? It's –"

"I know." I say. "I know." We're silent but it's a comfortable silence. The peacekeepers come to get her. They don't pull her out though, I guess it's because she's the mayor's daughter.

"You have to win." It's what everyone has been telling me. I nod. She gives me a hug and then a kiss on the cheek. "You have to come home!" then she's gone. I expect for there to be no more guests but I'm wrong. Peeta's parents appear. His mother stays by the door. She's not giving me her usual glare. She looks sad and tired.

"Here." He hands me a box that contains three cookies.

"Thank you." I smile sadly.

"I'll keep an eye out on Prim, make sure she's eating." He says. I nod. Prim meet the baker when we went to visit Peeta a few weeks ago – before he and I stopped talking.

"Thank you." I say again. Then I think of Peeta. "I'm sorry." He nods. He knows that I hurt Peeta. That I broke his heart. And now I will have to either let him be killed or kill him myself.

"I know." He says. The peacekeepers are back and ask him to leave. They do so willingly. But the bakers wife stops at the door another moment.

"Maybe District twelve will finally have a winner." She says sadly. Then she leaves. She must be talking about Peeta. I wouldn't doubt it. He's strong, he can fight, he's handsome, and he's kind. Peeta has a way with words. I have no doubt he'll be able to get a few sponsors.

* * *

Peeta and I are escorted down to the train station where we will board a train to the capitol for our slaughter. Effie Trinket doesn't shut up as we ride to the train station. She tells us about the food and the clothes. She tells us that we'll absolutely love it. I refrain from rolling my eyes.

We have our own bedroom in the train. Effie tells us to get a goodnight sleep tonight because tomorrow we will arrive at the Capitol and meet our stylists. Peeta and I nod as we make our way to our rooms. I'm exhausted from today's activities and want nothing more than to fall in bed and cry.

"Peeta." I start. He looks at me. His eyes are red which show he's been crying. My heart feels like it wants to split in two. I reach for his hand.

"Katniss." He sighs. He holds onto my hand for a moment before letting go. "I'll see you later." Instead of going to bed like I planned I go take a quick shower. The water is warm and reminds me a summer rain. I kneel on the floor crying loudly.  
This isn't fair. Why did two people that I care about have to get reaped. Why did Peeta have to join me? The only way I can get out is if he dies. And the only way he can get out is if I die. And what if we both die? Who will take care of Prim?

More tears. I sit on the floor as the water hits me back. I pull my knees us to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Chapter 3**_

* * *

**_Four or so months ago_**

_It's the day before my sixteenth birthday. I'm sitting in the meadow watching Prim make a crown out of a yellow flower. Dandelions. "Tomorrow this will be your crown." She smiles. _

_"Crown?" I laugh. "Why would I need a crown?" _

_"Because you will be the birthday princess!" she smiles. I laugh. My little sister is the sweetest person in the world. She's the only person I'm sure that I love. _

_"Hey Catnip." Gale says. He's walking towards me and Prim. "So I hear tomorrow is a special day." I roll my eyes. _

_"Hardly." I say. Prim frowns. _

_"Hey Kat!" Madge calls. Kat. It's the nickname she's been calling me for a while. _

_"Madge." I say. "What are you doing here?" Just two weeks ago she was in her bed crying her eyes out over that idiot that hurt her. _

_"I came to see you." She says. "Tomorrow is your birthday after all and I was wondering if you wanted to help me pick out a cake." _

_"A cake?" Gale asks. He and Madge aren't really friends but he puts up with her. It's not that Gale hates Madge specifically it's just that he hates the towns people. He thinks they look down on us, which they do. Seam and Merchant don't get along. _

_"A cake." She confirms. _

_"For who?" I ask. I don't recall their being any special celebrations coming up. Prim and Madge both roll their eyes at me. _

_"You, silly." Prim says. I sigh and stand up. _

_"You know we can't afford a cake, Prim." I say. I brush the grass from my pants. _

_"But you're not buying it." Madge says. At this I freeze. _

_"Madge-" I start but she lifts her hand up as a way to tell me to stop talking. _

_"This is what friends do, Katniss." Madge says. "If you want you can repay me with strawberries?" she smiles. I purse my lips. _

_"Oh come on, Katniss." Prim says. "Just a small one?" I look to Gale for help. He shakes his head and takes a step back telling me he's going to stay out of it. I sigh. _

_"Strawberries it is." I sigh. Madge and Prim high five each other. _

_"Perfect!" Madge says. "Come on let's go pick one out! I'll keep it at my house until tomorrow." She and Prim take my hand and lead me to town. I can hear Gale laughing at my expression of horror. _

_"Aren't you coming Gale?" Prim asks. He shakes his head. _

_"I'm going home to help with dinner." He says. "See you later." I glare at him. It's two in the afternoon and we both know he doesn't eat dinner until at least six. He just doesn't want to come to the bakery with us. _

_I let Prim and Madge drag me to the bakery. Prim runs toward the bakery almost as soon as it's in sight. She presses her nose to the bakery window. _

_"This one has roses! Oh and look at this one!" she points to various cakes. _

_"Let's go inside." Madge says. I haven't been in the bakery since my father was alive. Gale and I always use the back door whenever we trade with the baker and it's usually my mother who comes in and buys bread._  
_We are engulfed in the sweet smell of bread, cookies, and other bakery goods as soon as the door opens. _

_"Hello, Peeta." Madge says. I gasp as Peeta Mellark turns around. The memory of the day when he saved me from starvation appears once again. _

_"Hey, what can I help you with?" Peeta asks. He smiles at us while whipping his flour covered hands on his apron. _

_"We want a cake." Madge says. "It's Katniss birthday tomorrow." _

_"Oh?" Peeta's blue eyes lock on me. There's a hint of recognition there. _

_"Are these the only cakes available?" Madge asks as she points to the ones displayed on the window. _

_"Those aren't for sale." Peeta says. Prim's smile fades. "Those are pre-ordered. We just put them on the window for a few hours before the customers come and get them." Prim nods understandingly. _

_"We can have a cake made by tomorrow if you want." Peeta says. He looks at me again. _

_"Okay." Madge says. _

_"Can it have some Katniss flowers and Primroses on it?" Prim asks. Peeta smiles. _

_"Of course." He says. "Katniss flowers are my specialty." My eyes lock on his. Is that just a coincidence? It can't be, can it? "Along with roses and Primroses." He adds quickly. He looks down, a blush covering his cheeks. I look away too. _

_"You decorate the cakes?" Prim gasps. Peeta nods. _

_"I'm very good with icing." He explains with a sweet smile. _

_"I can tell." She says. "The cakes are always so pretty." _

_"Prim loves to look at them whenever we pass by." I add. Peeta looks up at me, smiling. _

_"Do you like them?" he asks. Out of the corner of my eyes I see Madge smile widely. _

_"Yes." I say. "I do." Peeta's smile becomes brighter and happier than I would have thought possible. _

_"I'll make sure your cake is the best of them all then." He says. We all smile. _

_The next day Prim, Madge, Gale, his brother, sister, and our parents all enjoy the delicious cake that Peeta had made. It's in the shape of a circle with all kinds of flowers around it. There are mainly Primroses and Katniss flowers but you can see roses and other pretty flowers too. The mixture of colors is amazing. I think that cake was one of the prettiest cakes he had done. On top, in the middle of all the flowers were the letters 'Happy Birthday Katniss' in careful handwriting. The cake had also come with a gift. A cookie in the shape of a Katniss flower._

_That day was the first day I talked to Peeta Mellark._

* * *

**Modern day. **

I stay in the shower, crying, for an hour. Effie comes and gets me for dinner as I'm drying off. But I don't want to go to dinner. I want to stay in my room and cry. I put on a green outfit and pin Madge's Mockingjay pin to it. I'm glad I have it. It reminds me of home. It helps me calm down.

Peeta is already sitting down when I get there. The car is empty of other life.

"Hi." I say. Peeta looks up from his plate. He looks tired and years older.

"Hi." He says. His eyes linger on me. I know it's obvious I've been crying. My eyes are puffy from the tears and my eyes are still red. "Are you okay?" he asks. I shake my head and turn away. I bite my lip as I focus on watching the trees out the train window. I sneak a quick look at Peeta. He's quiet and I see he has that look on his face that says he's unsure about what to do next.  
He sighs. A second later I hear him get up and walk to me. I feel him wrap his arms around me from behind. I don't push him away like I should. The feel of his gentle yet strong arms around me soothes me. It takes the fear and sadness away. I twist so that I wrap my arms around him too. I lean against him, using him for support.

"Kat. . ." he sighs into my hair. My arms tighten. I know this isn't right. I know that I broke his heart just a week ago. I know I told him that I didn't care about him. I know this isn't right. I know he's probably suffering more than I am but I'm selfish. I need him.

"I'm sorry." I say. He doesn't say anything. "Peeta -" I start but he interrupts me. My arms refuse to let go of him.

"We can't. We're both supposed to be enemies – we can't – " he starts pulls away.

"I know." I don't let go of him. More tears make their way down my cheek. "I'm sorry."

"Tell me something, Kat, were you lying that day?" he asks. I look up at him, confused. "Or did you change your mind?" I open my mouth but nothing comes out. I should just tell him the truth. Tell him that I did love him but that I was scared. But how can i? It's just going to be even more painful when we have to kill each other in the arena.

"Peeta. . . ."

"Well, well, well," someone slurs. I pull away from Peeta and take a step away. I bite my lip as my face turns a scarlet red.  
There stands Haymitch Abernathy. Our mentor. District twelve's past victor. "So you two are Katniss and Peeta. I've heard a lot about you." My mouth falls open with a pop. Even this drunk victor has heard about us.

"Heard what?" Effie asks as she enters. She sits down at the table and starts filling her plate with all types of food. Peeta and I both sit down quickly as hunger takes over.

"Oh nothing." Haymitch says. "Just that these two are in love." He chuckles. Peeta looks down at his plate.

"Just one, actually." he whispers. I bite my lip and look down too.

"That's not fair, Peeta." I whisper.

"It's the truth." He shrugs. But it's not, I want to say.

"Oh, you poor things." Effie sighs. "Star-crossed lovers." Peeta's eyes lock on me.

"Hardly." He says coldly. I want to cry. It's not fair, Peeta. I do care about you. But I don't dare say anything. It will just make things harder.

We eat the rest of the exquisite meal in silence.

* * *

"You're our mentor!" Peeta hisses. "You're supposed to give us tips on how to stay alive!" Haymitch ignored him as he continues to thin a red liquid with alcohol.

"It's no use." I tell Peeta. We've been trying all morning to get Haymitch to tell us how to survive the Hunger Games. In anger Peeta slaps the glass away from Haymitch's hand. It falls on the green carpet. It's the first time I've seen Peeta lose his temper. It's shocking.  
Haymitch takes a moment to realize what happened then his face reddens in anger. He lashes out and punches Peeta across the jaw. My eyes widen. The knife I had been using to cut my food is suddenly flying across the table landing just a few centimeters from Haymitch's shoulder. It sticks solidly to the chair. I braise myself for the blow that's sure to come.

"Well, well, did I actually get a pair of fighters this year?" Haymitch chuckles. Peeta and I exchange expressions. "You want some tips?" We nod slowly, unsure of where this is going.

"Tell us where the safest place to go is after the cornucopia bloodbath-" Peeta starts.

"Now wait a minute, before that you have to meet your stylist. Now you're not going to like what they do to you both don't resist. Got it?" Haymitch says. Peeta and I exchange looks once again.

"Fine." I say. Haymitch stands and reaches for the liquor bottle at the middle of the table.

"And don't ever interfere with my drinking." He gulps down some of the white stuff in the bottle before leaving.

* * *

"And what do we do with coal?" Cinna, my stylist asks. "We light it on fire." Now this is when I begin to think that Cinna's calm demeanor masks a complete madman. What person on their right mind would think of lighting to people on fire?

"Are you sure this is safe?" I ask. Cinna gives a hesitant nod. He excuses himself to consult with the other stylist whose name I think is Portia.  
It's the opening ceremonies, when the tributes are first presented to the Capitol. Each tribute gets a stylist and that stylist has the job to come up with an outfit describing his or her tribute District main industry. District 12 main industry is coal. Usually the tributes wear ugly, loose, coal miners outfits or stand naked while covered in coal dust. But Cinna has the idea of lighting us up on fire just like you light coal on fire.

"What do you think of all this?" Peeta asks later when we're standing next to our chariot.

"I don't know." I say. I look around nervously at the other tributes. Most of the guys are a head taller than me. The girls are my size but most of them have been trained their whole lives for this. They probably know of a hundred different ways to kill someone with a sharp stick.

"What better way to represent our Districts main industry than going out into the crowd looking like charred peace's of human coal." he chuckles darkly.

"True." I mutter. There is no sign that things are going to begin anytime soon so Peeta and I wander off. We steer clear of the other tributes though.

"What are we doing Katniss?" Peeta asks. I pet the coal black horse and feed it a sugar cube.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"You said you didn't want to see me anymore." He whispers. I bite my lip. I did say that. "You never answered me the other day, you know." I look up at him. At his clear blue eyes. The blue eyes that I fell in love with.

"I lied." I whisper. The words come out without my permission. I instantly begin to regret ever speaking. This will no doubt be the death of me.  
Peeta doesn't have time to respond because Cinna is next to us once again. He tells us that it's time. Then before I know it, I am lit on fire. I braise myself for the burning pain but it never comes. I only feel a faint warm sensation.

"It works." Cinna smiles. "Remember, heads high, smile. They are going to love you." And we're moving.

* * *

So, here's the new chapter. Oh, and I've been looking for a Beta Reader because sometimes i miss things and i don't notice until i've already published the chapter. So, please, if you're interested just PM me. :) thanks. And tell me what you think about this chapter! :D


	4. Chapter 4

**_Chapter 4_**

* * *

_**It's a week after my birthday.** Prim and I were in the square buying cloth to make new clothing for the reaping. It was tradition to dress up for the reaping and Prim needed cheering up. She had been waking up screaming about nightmares for the past few days. _

"_Katniss, look its Peeta!" Prim giggles as she points to him. Katniss looks to where she's pointing and sees him along with his brothers. He's holding a heavy looking sack of flour over his shoulder. He spots us and immediately walks over, smiling; the sack of flour still on his shoulder. _

"_Hello, Katniss." Peeta said. "Hi prim." Prim says a polite greeting before quickly excusing herself. She gives me a smile as she heads towards the textile store._

"_Hi, Peeta." I bite my lip, unsure of what to say next. _

"_Did you enjoy your birthday?" he asked. I nod slowly. "And the cake?"_

"_It was delicious. Prim loved it." I said. _

"_I'm glad." We stand in an awkward silence. _

"_Um, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out this weekend? Madge can come too, if you want." He says. Madge had told me a day ago that Peeta was thinking about asking me to hang out. I had thought she was kidding but here we are. _

"_Okay." I say. "Saturday?" He bursts into a smile. _

"_Saturday it is." He says. That night I scold myself for agreeing to meet Peeta. It's not like I liked him. But maybe we could be friends. It'd be nice to thank him for that day with the bread._

* * *

**Katniss**: The Girl on Fire. That's what they call me. Cinna's outfit helped me make an impression. I know that I will not be forgotten. My name will be forever burned into their brains, possibly earning me a few sponsors. Katniss: The Girl on Fire. That should be important. I should be happy. But I'm not.  
Peeta can't meet my eyes for more than a second.

"Peeta –" I start when we're headed to the elevator. I see his hands clench, his knuckles turn white. "Peeta?" Effie, who was walking far behind us, is suddenly next to us.

"It's bad manners to ignore someone, Peeta." Effie quips. His knuckles turn an even brighter shade of white. I'm afraid that he'll draw blood.

"Is it?" Peeta asks. He looks at me. There's a flame in his eyes – one that I don't like seeing. It's wrong. It doesn't belong in his usually calm blue eyes.

"Of course!" She says. I'm quiet.  
Effie shows us to a glass elevator that, as it rises, lets us see the entire Capitol. I'm in awe at the sight of the tall buildings, the amazing architecture and for a second I forget that the people who watch children die every year live here. But I can't really hate them. Not when they brought me and Peeta together again. I sigh. Effie shows us to our rooms. She tells us that we can use and do whatever we want for the rest of the day. Peeta locks himself in his room preventing me from talking to him for the rest of the night.  
I thought he would be happy when I told him the truth. I thought he would hug me and kiss me and comfort me – now I know that was selfish. I was selfish. I broke his heart only to tell him that I cared about him when we're both sentenced to kill each other.

This just adds to the reasons of why I never wanted to fall in love.

* * *

Peeta won't talk to me. He ignores me during practice. He doesn't show up for dinner much to Effie's displeasure. By the second day I'm getting fed up with him. I told him how I felt about him and he gets angry. _Angry!_ So on the second day I ignore him too. When people ask me where Peeta is I answer with 'Who?'. I stop showing up to dinner, breakfast, and lunch preferring to eat in my room. I refuse to comment on anything that involves Peeta. After all, if Peeta can do all that then why can't I?

I think Effie is starting to get frustrated. Haymitch wanted to present us as a 'team' but when he sees that that will never happen he becomes frustrated. When I get back from the training center Haymitch is yelling at Peeta. He's angry not only at our stubbornness but at our stupidity too.

"No!" Peeta yells.

"You are an idiot!" Haymitch yells. "All I've heard the past few weeks in District twelve were how much you two _loved_ each other and how people ached for you to be together – to show that there isn't a wall dividing seam from merchant! Forbidden Love they call it!"

"What does that have to do with anything?" I hear Peeta murmur. I shouldn't be listening in – Effie would surely scold me but it's the first time I've heard Peeta's voice since the Opening Ceremonies. Plus this concerns me too.

"It has to do with everything!" Haymitch says. "She confessed to you, did she not?" Peeta was silent. "And you confessed to her."

"We're going into the Hunger Games, Haymitch." Peeta says. "In case you didn't know, only one person comes out."

"So why don't you just enjoy the last few hours you have together?" Haymitch yells. That's when I stop listening and walk away. Is that why Peeta won't talk to me? Because we're going into the arena? It's not because he hates me – and that gives me hope. We can be together – even if it's just for a few hours. We can be together up until I die. It doesn't seem that bad.  
I reach to open the door when I hear those four words. Those four words that make my heart shatter into a billion pieces.

"I don't love her!" My hand freezes on the doorknob.  
I make sure to slam my door so they hear.

* * *

I don't understand how Caesar can act so happy and excited during the interviews. It's like he doesn't know he's interviewing kids for their slaughter; like his brain refuses to process the fact that twenty three of us will be dead soon. That is if you're not already dead.

My breath catches in my throat as I realize that I'm next. A Capitol attendant is ushering me to the stage where Caesar Flickerman waits patiently.

"Give it up for the Girl on Fire!" He says. "Katniss Everdeen!" The crowd cheers. This is a good sign, the crowd likes me which mean I could already have various sponsors lining up. Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if I did after all I got an Eleven in the training scores after all.  
I look to the crowd as I'm walking and force out a smile that must surely look like a grimace because their outfits are . . . horrendous. Their skin is dyed and most are wearing some type of animal on their clothes. I see that some are wearing fur which isn't that unusual when you think about it but then there are ones that look like are wearing fish scales or antlers.  
I'm too focused on the crowd to notice that Caesar has asked me a question. I look to him, eyes wide.

"Huh?" I say and instantly blush as the crowd laughs.

"Overwhelmed are we?" Caesar jokes. I smile lightly.

"A little." I admit. The crowd laughs.

"So, Katniss, tell us about that _fiery _entrance at the Opening Ceremonies. What was going through your head?"

"Not much other than the worry of burned alive," I say truthfully. This seems to get a laugh out of the crowd.

"And what about that score? _Eleven!_" I look to where the Game makers are sitting nervously as the memory of me shooting an arrow into an apple near the Head Game Makers head make their way into my head.

"Let's just say; I think it was a first." I giggle weakly. The Game makers chuckle to themselves as they nod.

"Oh, you're killing us!" Caesar sighs. _No, you're killing me_! I want to say.

"I'm not supposed to say anything about it!" I smile. Caesar pouts. "Would you forgive me for keeping quiet if I show you something amazing, Caesar?" I try. His face lights up.

"Of course!" He says.

"I'm wearing flames today." I tell him. His eyes widened. He studies me up and down nervously probably waiting for me to light up on fire.

"Are you?" He asks. I nod and stand up. Cinna had told me to save this for the very end and I have less than a minute left of my interview so now should be as good a time as any. With a deep breath I begin to twirl. There's a moment of silence that's broken by loud shouts and comeplements from the crowd.

"Amazing!" Caesar claps. "Simply amazing!" I stop.

"My stylist is _amazing."_ I tell him. He nods.

"Oh, do that again!" He claps. I giggle and begin to twirl once more. The crowd goes nuts. "Don't stop!"

"I have to." I giggle. "I'm dizzy." I turn and see myself on a TV screen. But that can't be me - that's a giggly, bright, and happy girl that's holding on to a man in a sparkly suit. Who is she? Is this what Haymitch was looking for during those ridiculous lessons?

"Don't worry; I won't let you fall dear." Caesar says. I blushed crimson, as I sat back down.

"That was wonderful. Really. Thank you, dear." Caesar takes my hand in his warmly and the bell rings. I stand up, wave to the crowd, and make my way back to my seat. I see the other tributes are shooting me dirty looks.

"So Peeta, are you wearing flames too?" Caesar starts off with a smile. Peeta chuckles but tells him no. Soon they go off into a talk about the Capitol and its perilous showers. He has the crowd wrapped around his finger long before two minutes are up. His charm always wins people over. I can even see that some of the tributes are smiling and trying to hold back laughter.

"So, Peeta, tell me – is there a girl back home?" Caesar asks. Peeta bites his lip and shakes his head unconvincingly. I feel my palms start to sweat. "Oh, come on. Handsome lad like you, there must be someone. . ." Peeta's eyes meet mine for a split second.

"Well, to tell you the truth there was someone I cared about, Caesar, someone I still care about." Peeta relents. My eyes widen.

"Oh!" Caesar sighs. "Do tell more!"

"She's beautiful and strong and amazing." Peeta's eyes meet mine again. "A lot of boys like her."

"She sounds lovely." Caesar smiles. "I bet you anything she'll be yours if you go back home – after that confession how could she not?"

"We can't be together." Peeta adds quickly.

"Why ever not?" Caesar asks. I see Peeta look down at his shoes.

"Because she came here with me." And he's done it. There are yells of pity coming from the audience long after the three minutes are up.

* * *

Anger has been growing in me for the rest of the interview. I refuse to look at Peeta until we're at our floor – and that's when I slam him into the wall.

"What the hell was that?" I demand. "First you say you don't love me and now you're telling all of Panem about how much you love me, how you think I'm beautiful?" I scowl. "You're sick, Peeta!" His face is clear of emotion while I'm on the brink of tears. "Honestly, how could you! How could you use _me_ to get yourself _sponsors!"_ I spit out. I feel a single tear run down my cheek. Effie, Haymitch, Cinna, and Portia are standing behind us watching the whole thing go down. They don't try to interrupt.

Peeta is silent. His face is clear of emotion yet his eyes never leave mine. I shake my head and take a step away from him. My feet carry me to my room, leaving Peeta's emotionless face in the hallway.

* * *

I'm sorry for the incredibly long wait for this chapter. I WILL try to update sooner. I promise. But thank you for reading and i hope you enjoy this chapter.

By the Way, don't worry too much about what just happened. :) Everything will be fine. . . i think. Probably not.


	5. Chapter 5

_Big thanks to the readers who have stuck with this even with the slow updates. Thank you for your patience and i hope you guys like this chapter. :)_

* * *

**Chapter 5**

The night before the games start is filled with nightmares.  
I twist and turn and groan and finally, after hours of trying to sleep, I make my way outside my room to the roof. Cinna had brought me taken me there after dinner to talk about what happened with Peeta. I had opted to focus on the streets below me rather than hear him scold me for my behavior. He left a after he noticed I wasn't listening with a sigh.  
I can't say that I understand because I don't. I don't understand how he could just _say_ something as sensitive as that. Didn't he think about how I would feel? Or did I not matter? Is the only important thing to him now getting sponsors?

I lean against the railing and take a deep breath. The air here isn't as fresh as it is at home.

"Katniss." My eyes snap open. I know that voice and it's not one I would admit I want to hear. "Katniss." He repeated.

"Couldn't sleep?" I whispered. I don't turn around. I hear him take a cautious step closer.

"No." He said. He moves to stand next to me. I keep my eyes on the city below. "You?"

"No." We stand in silence for a few minutes because what would we say? What would _he_ say?

"Are you okay?" Peeta asked. I turn my head to stare at him. He's not looking at me.

"What do you think, Peeta?"

"I think you want to push me off the roof." A smile forms on my lips.

"I can't. There's some type of force field that would push you back up." He looks at me, his eyes wide. "Wouldn't want anyone dying, now would they?" I said.

"Always worried for our safety." I heard him mutter. There's a moment of silence that I can't stand. We're pretending everything is all right when it's now. Tomorrow one – or more likely both – of us will be dead. And to make matters worse, I confessed. I confessed after we were both sentenced to death.

"What do you want, Peeta?" I asked when the silence got to be unbearable.

"To apologize."

"You have nothing to apologize for," I said. "You did what you did to survive. I get it."

"You're such an awful liar, Katniss." He whispered. My eyes meet his.

"Yet you still believed it when I said I didn't love you."

"I guess I just wanted to hear no." I looked away.

"That doesn't make any sense, Peeta." I scoffed. He turns back to look at the city and it's lights.

"No, I guess it wouldn't."

For some reason this angers me. His tone bothers me, his lies bother me, and right now his attitude bothers me. I confessed myself to him – I told him something I was sure I would never say and _this_ is what I get in return?

"What is wrong with you?" I demand. "You confuse me. You don't love me Peeta – but then you go and say that you do. I get that it was for survival – and thank you, I know it benefits me too – but just _stop._ Stop trying to apologize. Stop trying to be friends. We can't _ever_ be friends – ever." He studies me for a few minutes and then I am in his arms. He holds me tightly to him and I feel his breath on my ear. I don't move away because - because this might just be the last time I'm able to hug him like this. By tomorrow we might both be dead and I'm selfish. I want him to hold me like, I want to feel his warmth, I want to be embraced in his arms - I want this even if he's only doing it out of pity for me – because that's the reason he's doing this, right? He's made it clear that he doesn't care about me like he used to.

"I knew you were listening." He says with a shaky breath. "_That's_ why I said it." His words cause a chill to run through me.

"Please." I whispered. "Please don't lie." I broke away from his embrace.

"Katniss, I'm not – "

"I don't understand." I whispered. Tears are beginning to form. "Is it because of what _I_ did? Peeta , i-"

"No!" He interrupted. "I love –"

"Stop." I held up my hand and look down. "Just _stop."_ My voice is shaking.

"I love you, I really do – please believe me." I shook my head as tears make their way down my cheek.

"I _do_ love you, Peeta but we can't – _I _can't –" I bit my lip. "I really do love you."

"Believe me, please?" He brushed away my tears and turns my head to look at him. "I lied because everyone told me that it would be best. They said that the only way you could come home was if I died and they were right but I can't stand hurting you."

"Okay," I whispered. "I believe you." But I don't. He knows that. He shakes my head and sigh.

"I love you," he whispered. His arms make their way around me and we stay like that for a long time. But then I'm reminded that tomorrow the games will start and we will be enemies.

"I've got to go, goodnight Peeta." I turn around and walk back to my room before i do something stupid. Like kiss him.

* * *

_I hope you guys like this chapter. Next chapter the games will start but there will probably be two chapters at the most. _


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

The Games

* * *

_It would be like Madge to have a last minute appointment on Saturday. But at least she called this time unlike the other time when I waited for two hours for her to show up.  
I bite my nails on the way, nervous that I have to go alone. I would have asked Prim to come with me, as a sort of support, but she had to help mother deliver the Michaels new baby. I guess I could have gone too but I would be more of a liability. I don't have the healing skills that Prim and our mother have. I'm would be more useful if I left them alone to do their thing. And so I make my way to the bakery. _

_I feel odd, walking to meet Peeta. The only other boy I've planned to meet with would be Gale – and that's just to hunt. It's not for _fun_ or just because. We're friends, yes, and we do hang out once in a while but we never plan to do it. We just run into each other and one proposes to go somewhere and the other agrees. Plus it's never anything romantic and I feel like it somehow is romantic when it comes to Peeta. Why else would Madge have an 'appointment' on a Saturday evening? _

_Peeta is waiting outside when I arrive and I see his face light up when he sees me._

"_Katniss." He said. I hesitate and suddenly think the worst. Why does Peeta even want to talk to me? I don't have any money, I'm not incredibly Pretty, I don't have blonde hair or live in town like Madge. I'm not special. Is he like the other merchants? Just wanting me for some fun time behind the slag heap? I would hope not, Peeta does seem so sincere but, still, his motives are questionable. _

"_Hello," I looked around anxiously at the prying merchants. _

"_I didn't think you would actually come . . . where's Madge?" _

"_She had to do something today," I said. His smile brightened more than I thought possible. _

"_Then I guess it's just the two of us." He took my hand and leads me away from the merchants, to the fence, and out to the meadow. The meadow with the dandelions. I didn't even know that he knew this existed. It was a mile into the seam and the average merchant didn't stumble five feet into my part of town for fear of being robbed. They didn't know that robberies in the seam weren't as common as in they were in their home. Everyone respected each other in the Seam and there was really no need for stealing. Everyone was happy to help each other in any way possible. _

"_What are we doing here?" I asked. He smiled down at me and shrugged. _

"_I thought you would feel more comfortable here but if you want to go back . . ."_

"_No!" I said. "I'm fine." I was very conscious of his hand on mine when he fell backwards, taking me with him. I gasped as I hit the cool grass. He chuckled. _

"_I love to come here and paint." _

"_What do you paint?" I asked. There hardly seemed to be anything that would interest him. There's no fancy decorations or pretty girls wanting to be painted. _

"_Everything. The flowers, the meadow, the sky. . ." I turn to look at Peeta, surprised. "What?" _

"_I didn't think you'd be interested in things like this. . ." I mutter. And slowly, but surely, I started falling in love with Peeta. I just didn't realize it until it was too late._

* * *

I should have known that I would have fallen in love with Peeta. I should have kept my distance.

There are things I didn't understand. Like why children had to be sent into an Arena to fight to death, like why my father had to die in the mines. Why my mother fell apart once he died. But Peeta confused me more than those things ever did – and it's not just Peeta anymore, it's the idea of _love_ that leaves me confused and makes my head ache. Why do people say that love is wonderful when it often leads to heartbreak? Why do I love him when we're both meant to die at the hands of another tribute anyway? Sometimes I just wish I could go back and stop myself from every spending the day with him on that Saturday- even if it did turn out to be a rather interesting day. I chuckle to myself when I think of Peeta's awkward advances at the end of the day, when we were walking home. I feel bad for getting angry at him now that I know he was being earnest. He wasn't just trying to get me yp the slag heap. No, he really cared. I was too naïve to see it.

I finally manage to fall asleep.

**PKPKPKPKPK**

The last person I see before I am engulfed in darkness is Cinna. He has a sad look on his face as I am raised into the arena. I feel my hands begin to shake and the blood drains from my face. I close my eyes and when I open them I see that I am in an arena that is made up of a dessert – and beyond the dessert is a band of trees. That's where I need to go.

The tributes are placed in a circle around the cornucopia and in the cornucopia are countless sharp weapons that can easily pierce flesh. The careers eye those weapons longingly but my eyes are focused on a gleaming silver bow with matching arrows. I instantly know that those are for me – and they're not that far away. I can run, get them, and escape in seconds.

But then my eyes meet Peeta who is three tributes away. He's nodding. That's all the motivation I need before I'm rushing towards them seconds before the other tributes are even off their platforms. I see the boy from District three scowl at me before a girl tackles him. The next few minutes are chaos. I get a hold of the bow just when the District 2 girl reaches the knives and I've seen her throw. She never_ ever_ misses. Her roaming eyes land on me and before I know it there is a knife being aimed and thrown in my direction. My eyes widen and I feel myself being pulled to the side but the knife manages to scratch my cheek.

"Run!" Peeta yells. He doesn't let go of my hand as we make our way away from the blood bath, toward the round patch of trees at the west. I turn around as we run to see the girl from District 2 being speared by a crippled boy from three. I'm momentarily happy for the boy, knowing that he didn't go down so easy, but then the boy from district 2 stabs him in the back thus ending his life. I look away and focus on running.

"Come on, we can't stop." Peeta orders.

"They're not going to catch up to us Peeta." I gasp. "I can't even see the cornucopia anymore." I lean over the sand thinking that I'm going to puke up my breakfast. Running is hard enough but running in sand is absolute torture. A few minutes later we continue running and then soon after that I do puke into the yellow sand.

"Are you all right?" He asks. I nod. I should have paced myself this morning. The Capitol food isn't good for me. It's too rich and this was bound to happen with all the running.

"I shouldn't have eaten so much this morning."

"Sometimes you eat when you're nervous." He smiles. I give him a sheepish smile and suddenly realize that I'm only carrying my bow. I don't have the silver arrows. My eyes widen and I groan. "What is it?" He asked, worried.

"I don't have my arrows."

"Yes you do," he reaches into an orange backpack and pulls out the arrows. I smile at him.

"Thank you." I say. "For getting these and for helping me back there." Peeta shrugs and we continue walking forward.

"Allies help each other, right?" The word 'allies' make me stop short. Because allies can only be temporary in these games. If it comes down to the two of us then I would have to kill him and that's something I can't do.

"Peeta –" I start. He cuts me off and tells me to hush. "What is it?" I whisper. I look around and reach for an arrow, afraid that a tribute might be hiding even if it's silly because there's really nowhere to hide but behind the sand dunes. Then my eyes land on a patch of moving sand. The sand raises its head just a few feet away from Peeta's foot and hisses. I gasp. "Run!" I yell. "Peeta, run!" Peeta sees the snake just as it lunges toward him. A second later an arrow is sticking out from its head. It writhers and shakes before going still. Peeta and I stare.

"Is. . . is it dead?" he asks. I shoot another arrow at it. It moves and we stumble back but it doesn't make any more movements. I shoot another arrow because now I have to make sure that it's dead in order to retrieve my arrows. This time it doesn't move. Peeta tosses a rock at it just to make sure. "I'll get the arrows."

"No -" but he's already reaching for them. I flinch as he steps on its head and tail to pull the arrows out. If it wasn't dead before it is now.

"There." He says. He hands me the arrows.

"Thanks." I say. "We should get going. There might be –" A scream interrupts me this time. Peeta and I both look the way we came to see a girl from District 11 being attacked by the snakes. They jump up at her and use their fangs to attach themselves to her skin. Behind her I see that the girl from District one, who must have been chasing her, is being attacked in the same way. The snakes wrap themselves around their limbs as Peeta and I stare in horror.

"Run." Peeta says. "Run." We do and we run fast. We run faster because this time our life definitely depends on it. This time the people chasing us aren't busy attacking other tributes. This time they're snakes that hide in the sand and can stick to our skin with their fangs.

"Why can't we reach the trees?" Peeta groans. He looked back one more time but we both knew we wouldn't be able to see them. They were only visible once they rose from the sand and until they did they were practically invisible.

"Just keep running." It seemed like the trees were getting closer yet we could not reach them. Finally we came to some type of ruin. I think it was called a pyramid. There are some buildings in the capitol designed in a similar way and I remember Effie telling me what they were called.

"Should we stop here?" He asks. I look around the ruins noticing that there is little sand. The snakes should be visible here.

"Yeah." I say. We climb a mountain of bricks and settle on the relatively smooth surface. I'm now aware of just how dehydrated I am and how this dessert it. There's nothing to shield us from the sun and we have no water and we can't seem to reach those trees. "What's in that bag?" I ask Peeta. He opens it and takes out everything in it. There's berries, a sleeping back that is useless in this heat but will serve as a pillow, sunglasses, a bottle of a green liquid that isn't drinkable, and an empty water bottle.

"Would it have been so hard to fill this up?" I hiss. Peeta reaches for the glasses and looks through them.

"Whoa. . ." Peeta says.

"What is it? What do you see?"

"Everything. This is amazing. Katniss – with these you can see the snakes even when they're in the sand." I give a sigh of relief. Something we can use. Good. The sun is going down and we're going to need every light we can get. "We're going to have to take turns keeping watch." I tell him. "We don't just have to keep a look out for tributes but those _animals_ too." Peeta nods.

"I'll go first." He says. "The sun is going down. Get some rest." I nod and lean my head against the backpack.

It turns out that night time is a lot colder than daytime. Peeta and I are shivering minutes after the sun fully sets and I find myself in the sleeping bag with him. I'm dozing off when the sky lights up and the faces of the dead tributes light up. A canon goes off with each face. I count them silently. Twelve people dead and twelve left to play the game.

I find it ironic that I could feel safer here than I did in the Capitol. I guess Peeta has something to do with that. I lean my head against him and try to forget where we are. I try to forget that we should separate soon. I try to forget my confusion at today's events when just yesterday I had tried to cut ties with him.

But, for now, I guess I'll just stick with him. We can always separate tomorrow and for now I just want to feel his comforting arms around me.

After all it might be the last time.

* * *

Tada! I really wanted to post this chapter so here it is. I listened to the **Wicked** playlist while writing this and may i say that** 'No Good Dead'** and **'No One Mourns the Wicked'**, and **'What is This Feeling?'** and** 'As Long as You're Mine'** _AND _**'Defying Gravity**' are my favorite songs right now. If you haven't heard them you need to. Oh and then there's the Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables . . . but don't get me started on that. Anyway, i hope you enjoyed this chapter. :) Review please


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

* * *

At first I'm not sure whether the screams are coming from my dream or from real life. In my dream, I see Prim being attacked by those snakes like the other young tributes. The snakes bite at her skin, staining her porcelain skin with blood while I watch helplessly. Then Peeta is screaming behind me as a tribute attacks him with a knife in hand. I'm momentarily still as I debate on who I'll be able to save.

I wake up to see that Peeta is fighting a tribute.

Before I can fully register what is happening, my hand reaches for the bow and arrows at my side and an arrow is lodged into her throat. She falls to the floor and goes still. I look to Peeta, whose eyes are wide and scared, and then at his bloodied hands. I look at the tributes body to see a knife lodged in her stomach.

I stand up and refuse to look at her pale face as I remove the arrow from her neck.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"She wasn't _sane."_ Peeta said.

"She was sane enough to know to attack you." I said. "Why didn't you wake me? You could have died."

"No, Katniss, you don't understand." He started. "When she attacked me – her eyes, they were _yellow._ There was no white. No color. Just yellow."

"It was just the sun." I said. I removed the knife from her stomach.

"Katniss."

"We've been out in the sun for a while now and you haven't slept." I told him. "It was the sun Peeta." He pursed his lips in a way I've come to know as defiance.

"Yeah. Of course." He said after a minute. I chose to ignore his tone.

"We need to look through her bag. She might have something useful."

"But she's dead!"

"Exactly."

"Katniss –"

"We need to survive, Peeta." I said. "This is how we can survive." He frowns but helps me look through the tribute things. He can't deny that I'm right.

We find an empty water bottle, a sleeping bag, apple, and another pair of sunglasses.

"She has several knives hidden in her jacket."

"It makes sense." I said. "She was one of the careers. Take them." Peeta hesitates but removes the jacket. I hold up the empty bottle. "Peeta, we need water."

"I know." We're silent. There are not lakes, no clouds in the sky, no rivers. How did they expect for us to fill these stupid bottles without any water source? But there must be one. We just can't see it.

I laugh darkly as I'm sure the game makers are getting a kick out of the frantic tributes searching for their cleverly hidden water source.

A second later I hear Peeta gasp and step back

"Katniss." His voice trembled. "Look." I turn away from the food and glasses and look at Peeta. My eyes widen as I see the girls arm is covered in tiny bites. But they aren't snake bites; they look more like animal bites. There's a foamy yellow liquid coming out of her body. Her arms are covered in red which I assume is blood. I look around carefully.

"We need to move." I said. "Now." I start packing up and hand Peeta one backpack, making sure that no strange animals or bugs are inside, grab my bows and arrows and get moving. I assume that there are other tributes near if this one managed to reach us. And if there are humans then I assume there are mutts as well.

As we walk through the sand and toward the crowd of trees, there's more screaming. Peeta and I quicken our steps.

"Snakes?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Those weren't snake bites."

0o0o0o0o0o

_We talk more than we should. We're together far longer than what's appropriate. He holds my hand and at first, I think nothing of it. It's just platonic. It's just friendship. So I hold his hand and don't let go until it's time to say goodbye. _

_Now that I think about it, I guess it was my entire fault. I must have led him on. He must have thought I felt the same way that he did – and I did. I just didn't realize it until it was too late. We didn't get to enjoy any time together and now I wish we had. Oh, how I wish I could have held him and how I want to feel his arms around me when we were safe. But it's too late now. Our love was doomed from the start._

_So when he takes me to the woods on that faithful day, I run away. I run because I never understood my feelings until it was too late. I guess I was too scared. I had never wanted to fall in love like my mother. I had never wanted children. I didn't want to turn into an emotionless being when the person I loved died. I didn't want to be my mother. _

_0o0o0o0o_

The sun starts to set a few hours into our walk. At first I'm confused, and I begin to assume that we've been walking for hours until Peeta tells me that they must somehow manipulate the sun to make it look like it's later in the day.

"Why would they do that?" I asked.

"Maybe the snakes can only come out at certain points in the day." He shrugged.

I look at the crowd of trees. They still look _so_ far away. We should have reached them by now but they look no different than they did an hour ago.

The sun hadn't moved from its spot and the warmth has decreased and a cold wind has replaced it. "Peeta, we should stop. For now."

"I was just about to say that."

We find another patch of perfectly square rocks just a few feet away. We've been seeing patches of square rocks like this one all day, some are bigger than others. The game makers must have placed this here for a place for tributes to hide.

Peeta starts to unpack the sleeping bags but I just shake my head at him. It might be colder but we might need to get away quickly and I would hate to leave these behind.

"We're just resting for a little while." I tell him. He sighs. And then suddenly we are engulfed in darkness. There is no moon, no stars, no _light_ of any kind and I begin to panic when suddenly a light appears in the sky.

"How many people have died today?" Peeta murmurs. Five faces appear in the sky. Seven left and once again, I'm aware of just how dangerous our alliance is. "Seven left." He whispers.

Peeta's blue eyes meet mine and I see that he has realized the same thing I had. His shoulders drop and the light in his eyes fade.

"You should kill me now." Peeta whispers. "Might as well get this over with." I turn away, stung by his words. I feel my eyes begin to sting and I bite my lip.

"There are five other tributes, Peeta." I said. "Don't be stupid."

"Katniss –"

"Just shut up and get some rest." I hissed. "You didn't sleep last night did you?"

"We can't avoid this forever!" From the corner of my eye I see him reach for the knives and my hand immediately reaches for an arrow. Peeta's hand freezes.

"Do it."

"Drop the knife and sleep." I roll my eyes, scowl, and release my hold on the bow. I grab the knives and place them next to my bow. I lie down next to him and, instinctively, reach up to kiss his cheek. "We'll separate when there are five left." Peeta thinks about this for a moment then nods. He's too tired to argue. Good. I trace shapes around his hand trying to soothe him into sleep like he does to me.

"Katniss."

"Yeah?"

"Sing." My eyes widen. I guess this is when I started to realize that maybe, just maybe, he did love me. But I shove those thoughts to the back of my mind. They're too dangerous right now. I can't afford to think like that when I might lose him.

"Okay." I sing a song that Prim loves. It's light and carefree and just what we need right now. Instead of a mutt filled dessert we're in a meadow, filled with daisies and dandelions and lilies. Instead of a hard stone bed there's a soft pillow made with feathers and a bed of grass.

"I feel in love with your voice, you know." He whispers on the brink of sleep. I move his soft blonde hair out of his eyes. "I love you, Kat."

"I love you." He struggles to keep his eyes open.

"Do you believe me?" he whispers. His blue eyes are so tired, so nervous, so beautiful. So earnest.

"I do." I crash my lips to his before he can say anything else and before I can change my mind. A minute later he's sleeping. A smile on his lips.

The game makers must have been touched because the atmosphere became cooler then. Nicer. There was a cool wind and the night became bright with moon and stars. The screams had stopped and the hissing ceased. I hadn't even noticed the hissing noises and that terrified me. A few minutes later there was a bell noise coming from above. A large water bottle landed on my lap. My eyes widened. Our first gift.

The joy didn't last because soon after things had calmed down two cannons were heard throughout the dessert. The temperature dropped and the sky darkened. The hissing continued. My heart fell.

Two dead.

Five left.

With a shaking hand I reached for the two water bottles and poured an equal amount of water into each. I split the food, placed a pair of glasses into the other backpack along with one of the sleeping bags. I placed all the knives into one backpack, save for one. I was careful to not wake him as I stood up and reached for my bow and arrows. I reached down and kissed him softly. I didn't dare look at his sleeping face as I made my way in the opposite direction we were headed. The wind should blow away any tracks I might leave behind.

* * *

I'm sorry it's taken my so long to update. Blame Physics and Algebra. Honestly, i don't why this chapter came out the way it did.

I want to thank all of you who are still reading and putting up with the slow updates. I think the Games will be over by next chapter because i _suck_ at writing Peeta and Katniss in the HG fanfics. I just don't have the mind for gore and fighting and what not.

**By the way. . . i'm currently writing two Hunger Games stories. One is called _Macaroons and Bread _and takes place in a Marie Antoinette type setting. Katniss is a girl from Austria who is sent to France to marry a handsome prince and stop a possible war. Neither are really happy with the engagement.  
I've been fascinated by that time period for ages now and i'm really excited about writing it. I'll post it after i finish Four Seasons. **

**The second one might be called _Overprotected _and it's about Katniss being the presidents daughter 74 years after the first rebellion. There's no snow and no evilness but she's constantly watched after and one day she gets sent to District 12 and meets a charming baker who shows her things she's never seen before and some family secrets are revealed. It's going to be _juicy _and fluffy! **

**I'll say no more about those two stories but i will say that I've been working so hard on them and I've been perfecting every single little detail. I'm very excited about both so watch out for those! :) **


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